Dec. 9, Pam Felton Funeral
It is 1:20 and my heart is racing as I fight back the tears. I have done several tough funerals, including my own Mother and Father.
I've also done my Father-in-law and Grandpa's. I wouldn't encourage anyone to do their parents funeral. It was awful
Excluding family members, preparing Pam's funeral has been the hardest I've ever done. I continue to see her two kids faces. I can't imagine what they're going through. To be 11 and 12 years old and realize your never going to see Mom again. WOW!
I have cried several times writing this funeral. Begging God to give me the exact words he would want spoken. Most funerals are celebrations because people have led good lives and are heading to spend eternity with Jesus. But how do you look two kids and a husband in the eye and tell them to celebrate.
Please pray for me. Funeral starts at 3:00. I do not want to be emotional. I want to be strong for the family. Here is a copy of my notes from the funeral. I know it is long, but in case you couldn't make it or find a seat, here is exactly what was said.
Pam Felton Funeral
December 9, 2009
My name is Dean Herman and I had the honor and privilege of being the Felton families pastor. I was having lunch with Jacob (my 11 year old son) at the elementary school and Bo sat with us. I asked Jacob afterwards, “does he always talk that much?” During one of the many conversations Bo told me they were coming to visit our church. Told him I looked forward to seeing them just blowing off the comment. But they came and never stopped coming.
PRAY
If you’re a pastor, funerals are a part of the job. Since being a pastor I’ve done funerals in SC, NC, Florida, Washington. At every funeral home, (including this one) I asked the funeral home directors if everybody went to heaven? Have you ever heard a funeral where someone didn’t make it to the pearly gates? 100% of the funeral homes have told me 100% of the people go to heaven. REALLY!
Matthew 7:13-14
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. [14] But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
I don’t have to try and persuade anyone who knew Pam Felton that she wasn’t a child of God. Gave her life to Jesus
Every individual here who has truly accepted Jesus as their Savior knows that when you give your life to Christ there is a change. You become about Him and not self. Pam Felton was not about self, but about Christ and others.
So what I want to do this afternoon in regards to our friend Pam is describe her as I saw her. I’m going to use an acrostic, MOTHER because she was such a good MOM!
M – Mother
Miss Linda, I don’t know you very well, but I’ve had several people brag on you.
And I believe Pam took those traits and became the awesome Mother that she was.
I had one of her dearest friends tell me, “I wish I was half the Mom she was.
Bo and Raleigh, I don’t have to tell you how much Momma is going to miss you.
You know just how much she loved you. You cherish that forever.
Mentor – Pam coached hundreds of little girls in cheerleading. And she did more than coach, she mentored them. She taught them how to be a better person. Parents never worried when their children were with Miss Pam. And that is quite a compliment.
Pam had a heart and a love for children and that is a gift. Our church has an entire theater designed for children. I walk over there every Sunday and thank the workers because I couldn’t do it. But Pam could and she loved it. She loved those children. She loved all children. She wanted to see children succeed, and not just her own.
Psalm 119:90
Your faithfulness continues through all generations; you established the earth, and it endures.
I called Mr. Haynes, Pam’s principal. I spoke to Dianne Rice (worked with Pam at previous church) Lisa Bolding, Kelly Dameron, Becky Bowman and other friends and co-workers and all of them said,
O – Others first
Pam didn’t care about what so many others are consumed with-SELF! And I feel certain that came from her walk with Jesus: She had the joy of Jesus.
J – Jesus first
O – Others second
Y – yourself last
Pam was a very busy person, but never too busy to help others. But also,
O - Overjoyed and Optimistic
Can you think of a better word for Pam? She just loved life. She enjoyed playing stupid childish pranks on people. She enjoyed making others smile. She was overjoyed when others did well. Every adult has said Pam was always attending other kid’s events. Cheering them on and overjoyed when good things happened.
I was told she didn't stress about keeping a perfectly clean house. She would rather be spending time laughing, having fun and making memories .
I think we could all learn form Pam in this area of her life!
T – Teacher
Pam taught children by the hundreds. She may not have been the teacher in the class room but she taught in the classroom of life. Let me explain.
I was asked to come to the elementary school Monday morning in case some students needed to talk to someone. A precious little red head came back broken, just weeping.
(Dianne Rice took her back and Dianne shared with meYou see she wanted to show Pam her new hair cut and share with her that she had been baptized. Most children aren’t going to share these things with their school nurse. But Pam was so much more. She was their teacher in life.
T - Thoughtful - If it was your birthday she might send you coffee and doughnuts or some other thoughtful gesture. She would attend events for children other than her own. Even with a busy schedule she would still make time to let her friends know how much they meant to her. If you needed help, she offered and insisted before you asked. Last Tuesday she suprised her cheer squad with a Limo to ride in during the parade. She enjoyed seeing their joy.
T - Thankful
she lived with a thankful and grace-filled heart – she always smiled, always loved on people and she was thanikful for her own kids.
Bo, Raleigh, you were truly blessed to have such a wonderful woman for a Mom.
Remember her, learn form her life. Tell your kids about her.
Bob, I know she loved you and was thankful for you.
H - Hero
Definition of a hero –
1. someone who, in the opinion of others, has heroic qualities or has performed a heroic act.
2. Has heroic qualities and performed heroic acts.
If you can see these qualities in Pam, raise your hand. I believe we are actually saying good bye to a true hero this afternoon.
Not the kind that is considered a hero for making millions of dollars or putting her life on the line on the battle field across seas. But the person who has helped shaped the life of so many people.
If you don’t think so, go to Mackeys website and read all the incredible things said about her. Page after page after page. Why, because she was thought so highly of.
But the best H word I could think of is Heaven.
Heaven
Pam is now sitting at the feet of Jesus. She has finished the race here on earth. No more worries. No more aches and pains. No more problems. She is walking on streets of gold and talking to Jesus. I envy you in this case Pam. Tell Jesus I said hey and we’ll speak personally soon.
E - Encouraging
She always had words of encouragement for everyone- "you can do it", "don't give up", "everything will be all right" - things that we hear often, but when it came from Pam you knew that she meant it, they weren't just empty words. If you were having a bad day all you had to do was cross paths with Pam and you were uplifted. Before you knew it you were laughing at whatever silly thing it was that was bothering you. Encouragement was her strongest trait as a coach. Quote from a mom of one of Pam's cheerleaders :
Pam's "last words to Kaitlin at practice on Tuesday were "you can do anything if you just believe in yourself". Strong words that she will ...forever hear from as she says now, her "cheer angel"
I want to finish this afternoon with a word for all of us:
R – Remember
Remember Pam. Continue to love Pam for who she was and who’s she was.
We also need to remember Bob, Raleigh and Bo. So many times we tell people were praying for them and then never do so. We just continue on with our life because it wasn’t our Mom or wife that we lost. Today were going to actually do it.
Bob, Raleigh, Bo and Pam’s parents, would you stand please. If your around these people and want to lay hands on them please do so. PRAY FOR THE FAMILY
Repent
1 John 1:8-9
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. [9] If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I want to finish where we began,
Matthew 7:13-14
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. [14] But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
Everyone isn’t going to heaven as the world wants to believe, but only those who have a relationship with Jesus Christ. Are you one of those? The Bible said clearly, only a few will go, not 100% of the people who go through a funeral home.
I've also done my Father-in-law and Grandpa's. I wouldn't encourage anyone to do their parents funeral. It was awful
Excluding family members, preparing Pam's funeral has been the hardest I've ever done. I continue to see her two kids faces. I can't imagine what they're going through. To be 11 and 12 years old and realize your never going to see Mom again. WOW!
I have cried several times writing this funeral. Begging God to give me the exact words he would want spoken. Most funerals are celebrations because people have led good lives and are heading to spend eternity with Jesus. But how do you look two kids and a husband in the eye and tell them to celebrate.
Please pray for me. Funeral starts at 3:00. I do not want to be emotional. I want to be strong for the family. Here is a copy of my notes from the funeral. I know it is long, but in case you couldn't make it or find a seat, here is exactly what was said.
Pam Felton Funeral
December 9, 2009
My name is Dean Herman and I had the honor and privilege of being the Felton families pastor. I was having lunch with Jacob (my 11 year old son) at the elementary school and Bo sat with us. I asked Jacob afterwards, “does he always talk that much?” During one of the many conversations Bo told me they were coming to visit our church. Told him I looked forward to seeing them just blowing off the comment. But they came and never stopped coming.
PRAY
If you’re a pastor, funerals are a part of the job. Since being a pastor I’ve done funerals in SC, NC, Florida, Washington. At every funeral home, (including this one) I asked the funeral home directors if everybody went to heaven? Have you ever heard a funeral where someone didn’t make it to the pearly gates? 100% of the funeral homes have told me 100% of the people go to heaven. REALLY!
Matthew 7:13-14
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. [14] But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
I don’t have to try and persuade anyone who knew Pam Felton that she wasn’t a child of God. Gave her life to Jesus
Every individual here who has truly accepted Jesus as their Savior knows that when you give your life to Christ there is a change. You become about Him and not self. Pam Felton was not about self, but about Christ and others.
So what I want to do this afternoon in regards to our friend Pam is describe her as I saw her. I’m going to use an acrostic, MOTHER because she was such a good MOM!
M – Mother
Miss Linda, I don’t know you very well, but I’ve had several people brag on you.
And I believe Pam took those traits and became the awesome Mother that she was.
I had one of her dearest friends tell me, “I wish I was half the Mom she was.
Bo and Raleigh, I don’t have to tell you how much Momma is going to miss you.
You know just how much she loved you. You cherish that forever.
Mentor – Pam coached hundreds of little girls in cheerleading. And she did more than coach, she mentored them. She taught them how to be a better person. Parents never worried when their children were with Miss Pam. And that is quite a compliment.
Pam had a heart and a love for children and that is a gift. Our church has an entire theater designed for children. I walk over there every Sunday and thank the workers because I couldn’t do it. But Pam could and she loved it. She loved those children. She loved all children. She wanted to see children succeed, and not just her own.
Psalm 119:90
Your faithfulness continues through all generations; you established the earth, and it endures.
I called Mr. Haynes, Pam’s principal. I spoke to Dianne Rice (worked with Pam at previous church) Lisa Bolding, Kelly Dameron, Becky Bowman and other friends and co-workers and all of them said,
O – Others first
Pam didn’t care about what so many others are consumed with-SELF! And I feel certain that came from her walk with Jesus: She had the joy of Jesus.
J – Jesus first
O – Others second
Y – yourself last
Pam was a very busy person, but never too busy to help others. But also,
O - Overjoyed and Optimistic
Can you think of a better word for Pam? She just loved life. She enjoyed playing stupid childish pranks on people. She enjoyed making others smile. She was overjoyed when others did well. Every adult has said Pam was always attending other kid’s events. Cheering them on and overjoyed when good things happened.
I was told she didn't stress about keeping a perfectly clean house. She would rather be spending time laughing, having fun and making memories .
I think we could all learn form Pam in this area of her life!
T – Teacher
Pam taught children by the hundreds. She may not have been the teacher in the class room but she taught in the classroom of life. Let me explain.
I was asked to come to the elementary school Monday morning in case some students needed to talk to someone. A precious little red head came back broken, just weeping.
(Dianne Rice took her back and Dianne shared with meYou see she wanted to show Pam her new hair cut and share with her that she had been baptized. Most children aren’t going to share these things with their school nurse. But Pam was so much more. She was their teacher in life.
T - Thoughtful - If it was your birthday she might send you coffee and doughnuts or some other thoughtful gesture. She would attend events for children other than her own. Even with a busy schedule she would still make time to let her friends know how much they meant to her. If you needed help, she offered and insisted before you asked. Last Tuesday she suprised her cheer squad with a Limo to ride in during the parade. She enjoyed seeing their joy.
T - Thankful
she lived with a thankful and grace-filled heart – she always smiled, always loved on people and she was thanikful for her own kids.
Bo, Raleigh, you were truly blessed to have such a wonderful woman for a Mom.
Remember her, learn form her life. Tell your kids about her.
Bob, I know she loved you and was thankful for you.
H - Hero
Definition of a hero –
1. someone who, in the opinion of others, has heroic qualities or has performed a heroic act.
2. Has heroic qualities and performed heroic acts.
If you can see these qualities in Pam, raise your hand. I believe we are actually saying good bye to a true hero this afternoon.
Not the kind that is considered a hero for making millions of dollars or putting her life on the line on the battle field across seas. But the person who has helped shaped the life of so many people.
If you don’t think so, go to Mackeys website and read all the incredible things said about her. Page after page after page. Why, because she was thought so highly of.
But the best H word I could think of is Heaven.
Heaven
Pam is now sitting at the feet of Jesus. She has finished the race here on earth. No more worries. No more aches and pains. No more problems. She is walking on streets of gold and talking to Jesus. I envy you in this case Pam. Tell Jesus I said hey and we’ll speak personally soon.
E - Encouraging
She always had words of encouragement for everyone- "you can do it", "don't give up", "everything will be all right" - things that we hear often, but when it came from Pam you knew that she meant it, they weren't just empty words. If you were having a bad day all you had to do was cross paths with Pam and you were uplifted. Before you knew it you were laughing at whatever silly thing it was that was bothering you. Encouragement was her strongest trait as a coach. Quote from a mom of one of Pam's cheerleaders :
Pam's "last words to Kaitlin at practice on Tuesday were "you can do anything if you just believe in yourself". Strong words that she will ...forever hear from as she says now, her "cheer angel"
I want to finish this afternoon with a word for all of us:
R – Remember
Remember Pam. Continue to love Pam for who she was and who’s she was.
We also need to remember Bob, Raleigh and Bo. So many times we tell people were praying for them and then never do so. We just continue on with our life because it wasn’t our Mom or wife that we lost. Today were going to actually do it.
Bob, Raleigh, Bo and Pam’s parents, would you stand please. If your around these people and want to lay hands on them please do so. PRAY FOR THE FAMILY
Repent
1 John 1:8-9
If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. [9] If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
I want to finish where we began,
Matthew 7:13-14
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. [14] But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.
Everyone isn’t going to heaven as the world wants to believe, but only those who have a relationship with Jesus Christ. Are you one of those? The Bible said clearly, only a few will go, not 100% of the people who go through a funeral home.
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